Facing the Fear of Starting Afresh
How to just start
The fear of how others will feel can stop you from becoming who you are meant to be.
I was scared of starting this newsletter. Yeah, honestly, I pushed back the idea of writing a weekly newsletter on Substack for many reasons. The biggest one was fear. Fear of several things.
What if people don’t like it?
Fear of my folks feeling I’m wasting my time writing to ‘internet friends’ instead of getting a job.
Fear of being unable to monetize my content because it’s not popular and I’m not an influencer.
Fear of quitting halfway if I can’t keep up.
I previously wrote on Medium, and It started as an escape room for me while battling depression. A few people liked to read from me, and my publication grew to a few hundred readers, but I didn’t want to keep writing to occasional readers. I wanted to build a community where people feel safe to read, share, learn, and grow, and we can all become better versions of ourselves.
It wasn’t easy. I kept pushing back until I said, Fvck it! If I perish, I perish. I realized that if I kept considering the feelings or reactions of others, including those in my life, I may never fulfill my purpose.
None of us have it all figured out. We are all a constant work in progress, some trial and error, living and learning from ours and the mistakes of others, and breaking boundaries just because we said, why not? You can, too, if you try.
The moment I thought It was time to stop letting my fears win and I had to take the lead, it was left to me to take action. As Siri says, Just start. I know it’s easier said than done, so I’ll tell you a few things that helped me face my fears and get started.
Journaling: It’s funny how we can spend minutes or hours chatting with friends but find it difficult to write down things we enjoy doing or our challenges. If you are struggling with figuring out what you want to do for yourself or deciding which passion project to begin, write them all down, and you will be in a better position to re-organize and prioritize. This will also help you set S.M.A.R.T. goals.
Writing down your thoughts, passions, and goals is a great way to declutter your mind and give you clarity for the next steps.
Stop waiting for permission: If you keep waiting for when your body feels ready to workout, you will never be fit. The same applies to starting a business or doing something for yourself. The last best time to start afresh was yesterday, and the next best time is now. Siri explains it amazingly well here.
Click anywhere on this image to watch the video. Be open to failure: Starting a new job, project, or business comes with mixed feelings and experiences. It’s best to have an open mind and remind yourself that failure is not the end of the road but another step closer to success. Your first attempt may not even go as you imagine, and those you expect to support you may not do so in the capacity you expect, and that’s okay. The most important thing is you learn from the errors and mistakes and keep improving.
As I write this piece and share ways you can face your fears and start afresh, I remember sharing my story about how I quit my job and how everything changed. I’ll tell you about it during the space.
The reality of life is that if you put your fears and every other person’s feelings above yours, you will end up living your life for others while they live their lives for themselves. I get that you may not even know what you want to do yet. You may have so many ideas but are not sure where to start. You may feel that your responsibilities are so much that if you leave your nice job for a passion project nobody will understand. You want to be there for your loved ones, and you want to feel loved and accepted, we all do, but at the end of the day, when you’re all alone with your thoughts, you will ask yourself why you never did anything for yourself that truly makes you feel whole. Your mental health deserves that freedom and fulfillment.
It’s not really about how much you accomplish at the end, but if you enjoy your journey here on Earth. There might be no second chance to live for yourself, so why not take the only chance you're sure of now?
It’s not about how many times you failed but how many times you tried again.
I’m not where I want to be, but I’m glad I didn’t let fear stop me from walking this path I’m on. And even if I get to the end and there’s no goldmine, the journey will be everything it needs to be to make me feel whole. You deserve that feeling, too. Go, get it.
Join the rest of The Real Talk community on Twitter as we discuss more ways Web3 can improve your mental health.
"It’s not really about how much you accomplish at the end, but if you enjoy your journey here on Earth." I love this line.
We all need to be better at enjoying the journey - me especially.
The other thing that really stuck out to me was the nod to journaling. Writing is so powerful for clarifying your own thoughts, working out logical fallacies, and for digging deeply into what's important.
Putting it on paper or on screen is the first step to getting started.
Appreciate you tagging me and showing me some love in the article. 🙏💙 I'm glad some of my content resonates with someone other than just me. 🤣
Great words!
what i have resulted to at this point where am at is manifesting. like literarily saying the right words out loud. Thinking about it or writing alone sometimes doesn't prove optimal (for me), i say it till i believe it.